Tuesday, February 8, 2011

True Confessions

I confess. I use motherhood as an excuse to stay fat.

From time to time, Denver would tell me I can lose weight. I can look good. I can bring myself back to my pre-baby body. I don't have to think about my response. My mouth is on auto-pilot. I just say I can't. It's not possible for me to lose that much weight.

But how I would love to be able to run a marathon, or wear a bathing suit without hearing fat girl insults, or shop and just be able to try on anything that's small, medium or large.

A couple of weeks ago, I was mistaken as my agent's mother. I can't quite get over it yet. Looking at my pictures used to be fun for me. Now they kind of embarrass me.

I want to love my body as it is. But this body limits me.

Years ago I told myself I will be at my fittest form in my thirties. I said that because I felt so fat in my twenties. I am now 32 years old. I gotta do something about it now!

I am looking for an inspiration. I am hoping that this blog will help me.


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